tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23942649366942715842011-06-07T23:03:26.588-06:00Just another way for me to avoid being productive on my journey to becoming a real writer.Annnoreply@blogger.comBlogger1681100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-84727310885078810322008-03-03T08:47:00.003-07:002008-03-03T09:00:55.700-07:00

It has become too time consuming to maintain three versions of what is essentially the same blog. So as of today, I will be posting only at my wordpress site: Anniegirl1138.Thanks to all who have visited me here on a regular basis and I hope you will continue to read at the new site.

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-81186055501853665652008-03-02T08:53:00.001-07:002008-03-02T08:55:03.699-07:00

We get nearly all of our movies from the library. Why not? They have them. They are free. And the selection is quite diverse. Granted, the movies we check out are not usually new releases, but eventually, things in the rental stores make their way to the library.Generally this system of requesting movies and picking them up at the bookmobile has worked well for us. Since summer we have caught up

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-20108416190195873532008-03-01T11:20:00.001-07:002008-03-01T11:20:41.355-07:00

My third funeral since September was just this last week. People I either didn’t know at all or barely had the time to get to know. This last one was for Fraser, Rob’s father-in-law and Farron and Jordan’s grandfather. It was held at the United Church in Beaverlodge, which is not far from Grande Prairie, and as close to mile zero of the Alaskan Highway as a person can be without being there. The

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-71789369924380263122008-02-29T08:55:00.000-07:002008-02-29T08:56:19.997-07:00

Jordan was remarking about her own willingness and ability to play with Katy. A friend had been asking her what it was like to have such a young step-sister and if she found it difficult to play imaginary games with her. Jordan admitted that she did find it hard and wondered when we lose the ability to do that and why. I have to admit that I didn’t have much of an answer for her though I share

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-31809068457480983852008-02-28T20:52:00.000-07:002008-02-27T20:53:08.057-07:00

Lately I have been dreaming I am back in university. They are not the typical dreams one has of being back in school. I am not late for a test or trying to drop a class I didn’t know I had or have never been to in order to avoid a failing grade. And I am not naked despite the fact that in several of these dreams I appear to be married or dating Rob – who I not only didn’t know existed back in my

Annnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-88237805260190577762008-02-26T11:25:00.000-07:002008-02-25T11:25:51.740-07:00

I’ve been thinking (again) about this life and loss stuff. There are those who believe with all their being that grief, whatever the cause, must be addressed until it can be wallowed in and analyzed and milked no more. There are those who are equally sure that it can be put away on a shelf like a book one has read and is done with forever. There are those who choose to deflect it with other

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-40794622084935913972008-02-25T21:48:00.000-07:002008-02-24T21:48:50.447-07:00

Sometimes it’s difficult to come up with blog topics day after day. Today is one of those days. It’s not that I haven’t ideas, but many of them are vetoed by my husband as being to TMI for even him. Others just aren’t thought generating to fill an entire page of blog. Often, I self-censor. Yes, hard to believe that I would veto myself, but I do. And then there are the days when nothing comes and

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-58022290902831941512008-02-24T21:58:00.000-07:002008-02-23T21:59:29.848-07:00

At some point in the next 24 hrs we will pile into the Avalanche and make our third pilgrimage up north to Grande Prairie in less than five months. Three funerals in five months. In many ways this is beginning to remind me of my childhood back in Dubuque. Around the time my Uncle Jimmy died back in 1972, there was a rash of deaths on my dad’s side of the family that had us attending wakes and

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-15469326406212966182008-02-23T19:29:00.001-07:002008-02-23T19:39:11.866-07:00

I have been checking and checking and today my first online submission made it to “print”, so to speak. I am psyched and hungry for more. Check it out and let me know what you think.Yesterdays MagazetteAnd thank you to Karen of Ann Arbor, Michigan who copped to being my 10,000 viewer at the original blog site, Second Edition at .mac. Thank you so much. And thank you all, dear readers. Though you

Annnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-5579152749020371622008-02-23T10:40:00.001-07:002008-02-23T10:42:26.841-07:00

When Rob and I first began dancing with the idea of meeting in person, we were still just friends. He and Cheryl were trying to organize a Bago in Manitoba for July and I made up my mind to attend, so we could meet. Well, that quickly went from meeting at the Bago to his picking me up at the airport to my flying to Edmonton first and driving out to Manitoba with him. I guess we should have known

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-68863015002346175522008-02-22T09:43:00.002-07:002008-02-22T09:46:28.508-07:00

My father-in-law Fraser - Shelley's step-dad - passed away last night. It's been less than three months since his wife - Leona - died.I've been asked to give the eulogy at his service. I accepted this honour.I've started many a blog post for here but due to other commitments have not taken the time to finish and post any. Writing the eulogy will be one piece I have to finish.

Robhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14728706092051920167noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-6012809654223684092008-02-22T09:34:00.000-07:002008-02-22T09:35:28.656-07:00

As we were driving back from the hospice last evening, Rob asked me how I could have been so upset with the grief counselor on Wednesday night for suggesting that I needed to go through her 10 week grief and loss workshop and then turn around and dig through such painful memories at the parents’ session at Pilgrim house. It was a good question and I needed a bit of time to work out the answer

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-15246195686604829812008-02-21T10:20:00.000-07:002008-02-21T10:21:31.813-07:00

My blogging friend, Marsha, wrote a wonder piece yesterday about the idea of “paying it forward”. She feels, as I do, that one of the things that should come out of life’s challenges and tragedies is a sense that a person should put what they’ve learned from their experiences to use in helping others who are going through similar situations. It is something I did as a teacher. My life, and the

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-7945187605336204332008-02-20T08:34:00.001-07:002008-02-20T08:35:37.932-07:00

Strathcona writing group last night was a small turn out. There were just three of us, but we had a nice discussion about online literary magazines and submitting. The two women who were there talked about their submission process and how they keep track of things. They are both published authors and one of them is an illustrator as well. It makes me a tiny bit jealous, but also determined to

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-37904088261311752002008-02-19T19:13:00.000-07:002008-02-18T19:14:45.206-07:00

This last weekend was a holiday weekend here in Alberta as Monday was Family Day. Yes, they actually have a holiday devoted to spending time with one’s family. Last year Rob was in Grande Prairie with Farron and Jordan visiting with his in-law’s. Without Internet or reliable cell service, we spent most of that weekend out of contact for the first time since we’d started communicating with each

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-26456608854232512852008-02-18T08:21:00.003-07:002008-02-18T08:43:37.971-07:00

We have been promising Katy a hike and a picnic lunch in the nearby Elk Island Park for some time, but until this week, it has been far too cold. Friday the weather turned and though not as warm as some of you in the southern 48 might think it should be to hearld the coming of spring, it has felt mighty good up here. Today we decided to skip our usually Sunday afternoon skating at the Moyer Ice

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-21790271380195150002008-02-17T09:46:00.001-07:002008-02-17T09:48:07.593-07:00

One of the things that I find hard right now about writing is finding an audience. I could simply publish my fiction, creative non-fiction and poetry on one of my blogs. Not here, perhaps my Wordpress site, but somehow that just feels like when I was in school and my stories would be passed around among my friends and classmates. It’s like this blog too or even my writing groups. Just not

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-38368244148839991732008-02-16T15:59:00.000-07:002008-02-16T16:00:52.341-07:00

A beautiful day in Josephburg follows hard on the heals of a warm, melty spring day yesterday. There is no mistaking the smell or feel of spring when it begins to arm wrestle with winter. It’s a bit like watching my daughter arm wrestle with my husband however. She hanging with both hands onto his wrist and dangling a few inches off the ground in a futile attempt to subdue him. Spring will not

Annnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-35258586528185198172008-02-15T09:39:00.000-07:002008-02-14T21:40:19.436-07:00

Katy’s catch-all for all upsets is a tummy ache. Her tummy hurts when she is frustrated, tired, bored, not interested in following directions and when she is stalling for time at bed (although sometimes she has growing pains to forestall her nightly tuck-in). An aching tummy can mean she is experiencing a grief wave or that she ate too many grapes. This has been such a standard of hers that I

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-46417805762171917062008-02-14T08:55:00.000-07:002008-02-14T08:57:45.995-07:00

When I would arrive at school last year, one of the first things that I did was to check my email for a missive from Rob. This was before our first face to face meeting in Idaho Falls. After that I rarely waited until I got to work and checking my mail was the first thing I did upon rising. I even kept the computer by my bed for mornings when I was bleary eyed from having been up well past

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-42018182568577782412008-02-13T09:35:00.000-07:002008-02-13T09:36:24.204-07:00

I have never been a fan of my plumbing. From the day my mother handed me a little booklet with characters out of a John, Jean and Judy book explaining the “exciting and wondrous miracle puberty”, I pretty much knew that girls got more than their fair share of the short end of God’s stick. It starts with not being able to be an altar-boy and just goes down hill from there. I think I was in sixth

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-35483175459714633752008-02-12T15:21:00.000-07:002008-02-12T15:23:09.006-07:00

The Equinox’s driver side airbag indicator light has been indicating a need for service since October. We bought the vehicle in September, so we assumed it was simply a matter of scheduling an appointment at the dealership and the problem would be remedied. But, it is now February and the problem remains unchanged. It’s not that we couldn’t get an appointment. I think we’ve had it in twice

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-71509484279355763152008-02-11T08:37:00.000-07:002008-02-11T08:38:04.493-07:00

I will probably end up publishing this from the library today because our Internet has been more off than on for the last while. One of the downsides to living out in the country is that you have two options for Internet: dial-up or satellite. The ironic thing is that we live in a probably one of the wealthiest counties in the province and many people choose to live outside the city on acreage's

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-55364954841982849462008-02-10T21:27:00.000-07:002008-02-09T21:28:27.622-07:00

Olivia and Wendy are usually the baristas on duty at the Starbucks when I am in Safeway during the week. Because I see them more than any of the others who work there, I asked them to pose for the photo I took when I decided to write about Starbucks. You might wonder, why write about Starbucks? It’s a completely commercial coffee house that is as responsible for the decline of civilization as

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-44145659171536593592008-02-10T14:42:00.000-07:002008-02-10T14:43:16.945-07:00

I received my first rejection email the other night. It was from an online poetry magazine called Blue Skies. I believe that it is run by a member or former member of the Fort writing group. I had gotten word of an open call for submissions from the leader of the Fort group and submitted three poems before the first of the year. They were about Alberta places: the Fort, Edmonton and a range road

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-72082431323088545062008-02-09T09:48:00.000-07:002008-02-09T09:49:55.594-07:00

Rob and I frequently meet for lunch at a little place on 100Ave called Subjoint. A woman named Tara who is one of those impossibly thin beautiful women that I always wanted to be when I was young runs it. When I asked her today if she would mind if I took a photo of her at work for this blog article, she assented readily, but I could see in her eyes she was far to practical a person to think

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-77838956439528123432008-02-08T09:17:00.000-07:002008-02-08T09:20:07.748-07:00

I wrote. Mostly that is what I did. Poetry for the Poetry Federation of Canada’s all call for submissions for nine new anthologies. The titles of these anthologies have me a bit stumped because they came with no content direction what so ever. The poetry of birth. The poetry of seasons. The poetry of relationships. A wide berth for interpretation could mean just about anything. I chose the

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-813054582637951062008-02-06T08:58:00.000-07:002008-02-06T09:02:53.126-07:00

I had heard about the “internet” from Jim, a long time friend of mine. We were staying over with Jim and Nancy in Calgary one time when we were up from Kansas visiting friends and family. Jim, whom I view as a bit of a technology buff, was eager to show me this wonderful new thing called the “internet”. We sat for an hour or two in his basement looking at a screen full of nonsensical text (at

Robhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14728706092051920167noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-91525967236493017912008-02-01T09:35:00.000-07:002008-02-01T10:02:51.131-07:00

I will be back when I am back.

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-45076829148689707032008-01-31T10:07:00.000-07:002008-01-31T10:08:38.282-07:00

My mother made a little pink coat for my Barbie doll when I was about ten years old. She made dresses and pants too. I rescued them from a basement purging Mom conducted the summer before last. She sold many of our old Fisher-Price toys, collectors items that she could have made real money off of on eBay were she not a complete Luddite when it comes to the Internet. The clothes were in an old

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-50264818933275172682008-01-30T13:35:00.001-07:002008-01-30T13:35:54.598-07:00

Of all the experiences in the world that a person might covet for his/her resume being looked to as an expert on anything widowed is probably not one many would want. But, in the last few weeks I have begun to realize that I do know a lot of things about widowhood that other people - fresh or isolated in their grief - could use. Not benefit from mind you because I think you benefit or not from

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-60724945172395869032008-01-29T10:41:00.000-07:002008-01-29T10:44:04.953-07:00

I was up early this morning. Like quarter to three early. And though I tried to get back to sleep, it eluded me completely to the point that I woke Rob with all my tossing and when I decided to allow him to rest by retreating from our bedroom to the office downstairs for some mindless blog surfing - he wasn’t far behind because he can’t sleep if I am not there (he tried the pillow thing first but

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-87711493155180054232008-01-28T22:39:00.000-07:002008-01-29T10:41:18.992-07:00

The fridge back in Iowa was almost empty. I remember Rob being appalled at the lack of just about everything when he came to stay for the first time before our trip to Arkansas. The fridge in our home here was stuffed and mostly with items of questionable edibility. Vintage describes a lot of things and many of them were in our fridge. But today all that changed because a very affable Hindu

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-84678603982298876832008-01-28T12:52:00.000-07:002008-01-28T12:53:35.406-07:00

It’s freakin’ cold out today. The drifts are up to my knees. I have cat starving in the garage, a kid to take and pick up from school because buses aren’t running, and a car that isn’t happy about starting. Not to mention shoveling. And I shouldn’t mention that because when Rob reads that I shoveled, he will not be pleased. Shoveling, aside from being the man’s job, is fairly hazardous in this

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-22072011992555910282008-01-27T19:41:00.000-07:002008-01-27T19:43:27.936-07:00

Okay, so because I haven’t joined nearly enough blog sites (MSN-Spaces, dot.mac, LiveJournal, Blogger, Blogher, NaBloMo) or have blogs enough, I went to WordPress the other day and started a whole new account and am rebuilding this site essentially at WordPress. A really neat function allowed me to transfer all the stuff at Blogger (which are the same posts as here) to WordPress. I called the

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-49489366829841623622008-01-26T19:40:00.000-07:002008-01-27T19:41:13.568-07:00

Rob and I were married seven months ago today. I find it interesting that we count the months. I was never much for month counting. Not when I was first married to Will or when I was pregnant with Katy (though the count is generally by weeks for that life event). I had to stop and count when people would inquire how old Katy was even. Consequently, I have never numbered my days as a widow. It was

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-78728338718411934692008-01-25T09:05:00.000-07:002008-01-25T09:06:10.239-07:00

I have never had the housewife instinct that so many of my female friends seem to have. I wasn’t much of a cook which my bare cupboards and barely stocked fridge more that attested to. I didn’t sew or crochet or knit or do needlepoint. I am not crafty (I think a special gene is needed for that). I can’t decorate. (Colors? They coordinate?) I don’t have collections of anything (and I am sure that

Annnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-53772465555779579282008-01-24T10:55:00.000-07:002008-01-24T11:02:46.794-07:00

Yesterday marked two years since my wife Ann’s first husband Will died. She admitted to wrestling with ideas on how to commemorate the date. Ultimately, she wrote a blog piece in tribute to Will, plus another one for the eve prior to the day.We talked about “dates” and which ones should be celebrated and which ones she thinks could be treated with a “pass”. Most Hallmark dates fall into the “pass

Robhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14728706092051920167noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-84853219634947905522008-01-24T08:59:00.000-07:002008-01-24T09:00:56.732-07:00

We cannot put off living until we are ready. The most salient characteristic of life is its urgency, here and now without any possible postponement. Life is fired at us point-blank.- Franklin Planner quote that Rob sent to me a year ago todayA year ago today I was at home having called in to work sick because of a sinus infection. I was sitting at my computer, as I am now, surfing the widow

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-22890114789838900342008-01-23T09:26:00.000-07:002008-01-23T09:27:08.540-07:00

Will died of aspiration pneumonia, a complication brought on by x-ALD not long after 9:30 PM on a Monday. His favorite football team had won the AFC championship the day before and he wouldn’t get to see them win the Superbowl two weeks later. He loved to play pool and read Stephen King novels. He hated peas and loved chocolate chip ice cream. He was a fanatic about grilling and would drag the

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-84241549429563384622008-01-22T21:47:00.000-07:002008-01-21T21:48:49.283-07:00

I look forward confidently to the day when all who work for a living will be one with no thought to their separateness as Negroes, Jews, Italians or any other distinctions. This will be the day when we bring into full realization the American dream -- a dream yet unfulfilled. A dream of equality of opportunity, of privilege and property widely distributed; a dream of a land where men will not

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-27901635668376278132008-01-22T09:05:00.000-07:002008-01-23T09:06:17.216-07:00

My first husband Will will be dead two years tomorrow. Interestingly I had a visit from him today as I was heading to the grocery store.I am a button pusher when it comes to the radio. I surf XM until I find something I like. I listen. And then if the next song is not something I care for or I am not in the mood to listen to - I begin my surfing all over again. After I dropped Katy off at school

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-74342441764943716462008-01-21T10:45:00.000-07:002008-01-21T10:46:01.686-07:00

Went and bought an alarm clock for myself on Saturday because I wanted to start getting up before eight (or eight thirty) and try and re-establish a more work friendly routine before moving back to the States. I will never find a teaching job that lets me sleep in and for now I could use the extra time in the morning for writing and getting things in order for the initial move. I know that April/

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-71698403323294313642008-01-20T10:43:00.000-07:002008-01-21T10:45:07.219-07:00

Last night I started sorting the last of the boxes of papers and other crap that I stupidly lugged from Iowa to Canada. Rob says not to be hard on myself about it, but it’s hard not to when you spend an entire afternoon shredding receipts that predate your daughter’s birth and are sorting through old check duplicates from four years ago. This was all stuff I had more than enough time to handle

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-19811663200881576942008-01-19T10:43:00.000-07:002008-01-21T10:43:37.369-07:00

The latest Oprah has an article by widowed freelance writer who found her current husband and soul mate by making a list of 100 characteristics that she wanted in a mate. Okay, that’s a bit too succinct. She visited a psychic some time after her second husband died because she’s had no luck dating and wanted to know if she was meant to spend the remainder of her life alone or not. The psychic

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-52093958456413558352008-01-18T09:55:00.000-07:002008-01-18T09:56:07.853-07:00

As we were getting ready for bed last night, Rob remarked, “You know, I think you have a pretty wonderful husband.” And I agreed. And I should have been the one to say so in fact. So I will do it today.All week Rob has been the rock in this lice business. He took over the laundry duty. He was there for both rounds of delousing shampoo. He nit-picked non-stop and with the patience of Job. In

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-55267771524144283452008-01-17T15:38:00.001-07:002008-01-17T15:38:14.431-07:00

As no critters were discovered during this morning’s hand delousing session, Miss Katy will be returning to school today with about four inches less of hair because I realized that we couldn’t avoid cutting some of it off. Her hairs is fine but think and curly. I felt terrible about that for some reason. But Katy is more than ready to be done with Rob and I hunched over her head picking through

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-80735247172687945962008-01-16T10:07:00.000-07:002008-01-16T10:08:50.148-07:00

After a long day in the lice trenches, my darling husband insisted that I still head to Sherwood Park for my writing group meeting at the library. It turned out to be a welcome end to the day.The Strathcona group is different from the Fort group. The Fort meetings are more structured. There is a presentation often times and someone leading the meeting. I took my turn last week and talked about

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-23266599950670950852008-01-15T10:39:00.001-07:002008-01-15T10:39:19.476-07:00

Well, my sis-in-law’s visit has turned out to the be gift that keeps on giving. Katy has lice. The irony abounds really because back in Des Moines Katy had a classmate who had lice, continually it seemed, for two years and despite her long curly hair, she never did get it. The reason for that of course is that lice isn’t that easy to catch. According to the health unit nurse I spoke with this

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-88390971465435461402008-01-14T15:30:00.000-07:002008-01-14T15:31:39.179-07:00

I have my first yoga class in about half an hour and have been killing a bit of time reading blogs, and yes - the widow board - and the theme of being grateful came up again. Sally’s little girl just turned four and she recounted the day and her birth story on her blog. She mentioned that she felt grateful for the time she was able to parent with her late husband because she realized that that is

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-30347237284097644512008-01-13T15:30:00.000-07:002008-01-14T15:30:41.357-07:00

I have been skating with an old pair of men’s figure skates I bought eleven years ago on sale at Target. I got them on a whim but ended up using them quite a bit those first two winters. There was an outdoor rink by the public library which was a 5 minute drive from where I was living. I used to head over there in the late afternoon when I got home from school and skate for an hour or so nearly

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-43786382788961374792008-01-13T15:29:00.000-07:002008-01-14T15:29:47.112-07:00

My horoscope yesterday said that I would encounter many people who were looking at the down side of life and would do their best to turn me to the dark side. It reminded me that this is against my natural inclinations and that they would likely not succeed. I have not been buoyant like this my whole life though. Although I have always returned to the sunny-side, in the past it has taken me longer

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-35193622304249987912008-01-12T15:27:00.000-07:002008-01-14T15:28:34.617-07:00

Last night I went through the totes with pictures. When we moved up here I had just tossed them all, most in the original packaging from the photo shop, into two pink totes and I haven’t looked at them since. Not that I looked at them much before anyway. I haven’t been one to document my life on film. Most of the time the camera was put away unless it was a holiday or a special occasion of some

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-45607107175905662852008-01-11T09:49:00.001-07:002008-01-11T09:49:43.999-07:00

There are no free-standing hospices in the Edmonton area. I was a bit surprised by this because there are three and a fourth under construction back in Des Moines. Hospice care is in home here. Rob’s late wife, Shelley, received hospice in the house where we live. The Pilgrim’s Hospice trains volunteers, offers limited day time respite and runs a variety of bereavement programs. One the programs

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-76848823758173515792008-01-10T09:36:00.001-07:002008-01-10T09:36:59.026-07:00

I have too much to do to be sitting here blogging. I am still plowing through laundry due to the week long visit from my sis-in-law. Her visit too stirred up unpleasant memories because like most widows who live and breathe it, all she wanted to do was talk about issues and irritations and grudges that surrounded her husband’s death. Unfortunate timing really with the nasty letter from my former

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-82793454136325031212008-01-09T07:55:00.000-07:002008-01-09T07:56:01.596-07:00

Rob got the okay on his transfer. The details have yet to be ironed out but it appears that I may be a Texan by summer. Moving back is not something I much considered when I came here to by with Rob and get married even though I knew that it was a possibility given his job. Now that it is a fact, I am a little sad. I will miss it here. Rob thinks that is a bit crazy (okay, a lot crazy) because we

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-38540698863768473552008-01-07T15:11:00.000-07:002008-01-07T15:12:05.345-07:00

One thing I have discovered is that impending guests, whether they be overnight or just for the evening and moving are about the only things that really spur people to action when it comes to cleaning and purging. Christmas brought us multiple overnighters which meant that the main room in the basement had to be cleaned out to make space for another bed. Cleaning out lead to a pile of junk in our

Annnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-85080150446381907992008-01-07T07:20:00.000-07:002008-01-09T07:21:15.441-07:00

Will’s mother was widowed at thirty-three. She chose a much different path to her now than I have chosen to mine. Nevertheless, she has had an impact on the way I view widowhood and grief and it could be said that I have gone the way I have because of her in some small way.She has never been allowed much of a role in Katy’s life. Despite what she thinks, and tells people, Will and I made this

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-56921772814133660352008-01-06T15:10:00.000-07:002008-01-07T15:11:16.165-07:00

The spring after Will died I spent a lot of time playing The Sims. In retrospect it wasn’t as mindless as it probably seemed at the time. In my little virtual reality, I had control over everything. Nothing happened without my consent and I could manipulate circumstances to have everything just the way I wanted it. Therapeutic? Professionals might not think so but as I played I slowly got tired

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-19177802156883581592008-01-05T08:43:00.000-07:002008-01-04T20:49:05.487-07:00

Yesterday I was owning up to having been tagged, but today I am merely stealing an idea from Alicia, of all people. She posted an overview of her astrological sign, highlighting those passages that pertained more specifically to her from her perspective and then adding a brief commentary at the end. She is a Capricorn, like my younger step-daughter, Jordan and my college friend, Fran. Grounded

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-66134759327861019472008-01-04T16:02:00.000-07:002008-01-04T16:06:22.215-07:00

I was hoping that when Alicia spelled out the rules to her recent game of blog topic tag - being that there were to be no general tagging of all readers and that you needed to tag people by name - that I would easily avoid this topic. I never get tagged by name. I am not a inner circle person. I just read blogs and comment as the spirit moves me and blissfully avoid much in the process. But,

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-64573810916164510652008-01-03T20:35:00.000-07:002008-01-03T20:36:28.955-07:00

Just when it seems we have enough familial dysfunction, we marry, inviting a whole new set of relatives onto the playing field.With Will I was embarrassed at first about the state of what made up my immediate family. He assured me that I had nothing to worry about and after I met his family I would understand why. And I did. My family looked like the Waltons next to his and as I got to know

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-10611551205666663252008-01-02T09:04:00.000-07:002008-01-02T09:05:38.276-07:00

It’s a bit past eight in the morning. Katy is still sleeping and I have the house to myself. If you have been following my in-law saga - now in it’s sixth day - you will remember that my sister-in-law and her teens are stranded here due to a car breakdown on New Year’s Eve day. Well, it’s a martyr thing. Last evening sis-in-law emerged from meek pity-seeking mode to reveal a more action oriented

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-84025385284826323492008-01-01T13:46:00.000-07:002008-01-01T13:48:39.510-07:00

Last New Year’s Eve found me on the computer at midnight after an earlier dinner out with my friends, Vicki and C.J. At one point in the evening two gentlemen were sending us drinks but while Vicki egged them on, I just felt as though they were pushing in where they were not wanted - at least by me. As I cruised the net into the wee hours I would periodically check my mail for a message from Rob

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-78860621052677376632007-12-31T22:37:00.001-07:002007-12-31T22:38:31.914-07:00

I spoke of giving up blogging in my last post because I wonder what good it is doing me any more and what I could possibly have left to say that might interest anyone. It’s not as though I, or my life, is all that interesting. But just when I thought I didn’t need the cathartic outlet that is my blog at its essence, my sister-in-law shows up at our home - four days later than she originally

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-75699444805657830352007-12-30T22:20:00.000-07:002007-12-29T22:22:55.519-07:00

Rob and I watched the John Cusak movie, Serendity, the other night. It was notable for several reasons. First, it’s the first time we have been able to watch a dvd in the living room for well over a month. Second, it re-introduced me to the term serendipity. And finally it reminded me of being cubed about this time last winter.Of late our movie watching has been confined to Rob’s computer screen

Annnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-39473806078618043202007-12-30T20:51:00.000-07:002007-12-30T20:52:15.821-07:00

My widowed sister-in-law is here for the week with her two teenagers and we have had a couple of lengthy conversations about widowhood. Two themes emerged in respect to myself. First of all there is the ever annoying comments on my inner strength and determination which render me “amazing” and which I will never really understand I’m afraid. I am not special or amazing though I will concede on

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-41330907895996899642007-12-29T21:17:00.000-07:002007-12-28T21:18:51.264-07:00

A widow I don’t know personally, Alicia, but whose blog I follow wrote a piece today on the need people have to keep their heads down after a tragedy and simply put one foot in front of another for a while. I can’t say that I have ever felt that way myself. When they told me that Will was going to die and that the process could take years, I fixed my eye on the far horizon and seldom let it out

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-63749018532470351802007-12-28T21:15:00.000-07:002007-12-28T21:17:07.441-07:00

My widow friend, Andrea, in Texas recently posted a quote from a movie that sums up better than I have ever been able to what it is that goes missing from our lives when we lose our spouses.”We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-44471828661171483892007-12-27T10:12:00.001-07:002007-12-27T10:12:48.108-07:00

I knew before she was even born that my daughter was going to be difficult. Some might say that the fact that she is challenging is a bit of self-fulfilling prophecy, but I don’t. She was stubborn and defiant and determined, and I could feel that in her long before I even knew what she looked like. Her personality was so strong it just radiated through me. And she has done nothing to dissuade me

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-137376305855689712007-12-26T23:14:00.000-07:002007-12-26T11:26:25.159-07:00

Rob and I have been married for six months as of today. And I know I write about him and our relationship quite a bit. And that I am probably boring everyone with my ramblings, but I feel that people don’t take the opportunity to acknowledge and celebrate their marriages enough. We get so caught up in the minutia of life that even though we love and appreciate our partners, we don’t take the few

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-57935410853463859662007-12-26T22:02:00.000-07:002007-12-25T22:03:32.217-07:00

Fears that America will be damaged or neutered or whatever by large numbers of immigrants who don't share "our values" as a country and have no wish to do so is not a new thing. According to the article Rise of a New Underclass by Ellis Cose, we have been down this road before and it proved untrue.http://www.newsweek.com/id/81598Part of our problem today however stems from the fact that there

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-37569685545367586262007-12-25T22:00:00.000-07:002007-12-25T22:01:03.843-07:00

We have trained Katy so well about not coming to wake us up too early on non-school days that she sat in her bed until 8AM before finally coming to get us up. I feel a bit bad about that as it was Christmas morning after all and I had heard her moving about for a while. She waited patiently while we threw on robes and Rob went to get his camera (because nearly every step of our lives are

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-3847085966739131802007-12-24T21:58:00.000-07:002007-12-25T21:59:50.911-07:00

This time last year I had known Rob for about ten days. He introduced himself to me via a PM (private message) on the YWBB (young widows bulletin board) in response to my response to one of his posts. He had posted about his daughter, Jordan, commenting on his teenage like behavior and I had replied, jokingly offering to be his evil twin as we seemed to share many of the same behaviors. His reply

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-35035265782488226492007-12-23T21:57:00.000-07:002007-12-25T21:58:38.898-07:00

It’s now late in the afternoon on the day before Christmas Eve, a mere 24 hours before the festivities begin in earnest, and only 4 presents are wrapped. Most of the groceries are purchased, but I haven’t looked up any recipes I need to prepare this faux Chinese dinner that Rob and I thought would be a good idea. The basement and Katy’s room is in complete disarray because Rob’s sister and her

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-20956796193154981532007-12-21T21:13:00.000-07:002007-12-21T21:14:51.083-07:00

I have been doing quite a bit of political blogging and commenting on others’ blogs at the Des Moines Register this past week or so. So much that my husband asked me tonight if I was planning to run for office myself. I told him I would be running for election right after I started to glow with the ethereal light of the chosen and asked him if he had noticed me lighting up the room at night with

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-32763696461709100432007-12-20T22:22:00.000-07:002007-12-20T22:24:33.080-07:00

So, Mitt Romney stepped up to the plate and shed a tear or two for the team because if you want to be the president of this country (the U.S. not Canada - they don't have a president and I don't have space to explain what they do up here), you have to be warm, likable (there's that word again) and fuzzy. You have to prove that on top on of that intellectual core that is aflame with great policies

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-76238537212928560352007-12-18T11:33:00.001-07:002007-12-18T11:33:28.354-07:00

I mentioned that I am blogging on a newspaper site in my old home of Des Moines. I try to be topical which it being Iowa and an election year means I do a fair amount of writing about issues and candidates. I have post a few of the things I have written for that site here. Two of those pieces being about sexism. My latest piece on the DM Register site is about an article I found on MSNBC about

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-53201613077304914142007-12-17T16:52:00.000-07:002007-12-17T16:53:28.458-07:00

It’s been away since I have discussed the state of facilities here in Canada though it occurs to me that I am perhaps being unfair in labeling the whole of the country a no-pee zone. It could be just an Alberta problem. For a province with a boom economy and a building streak that has buried an entire canola field under a slew of condos and houses in the Fort since I have moved up here, not much

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-61966005924213849852007-12-17T09:23:00.000-07:002007-12-17T09:25:19.043-07:00

I still read the widow board sometimes. Thankfully the time I spend there is less and less. I just don’t have the time really and frankly, when I do read it either depresses or infuriates me.Two things of late that I have noticed there that are eating at me for some reason. The first is the tendency of older board members to condone mean-spirited behavior from some of the members while scolding

Annnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-80302501683399811952007-12-16T11:06:00.000-07:002007-12-16T11:08:03.928-07:00

The current cover of People features a bikini-clad television actress with the protesting title "I am not Fat!" And she isn't, not by even the most twisted standards of beauty that have infiltrated our society and handed it new weapons with which to re-enslave women. Ms. Love-Hewitt is a size two, and I mention this only because I know someone will dispute her claim of a healthy weight (and me)

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-19225340406609538742007-12-15T10:37:00.001-07:002007-12-15T10:39:02.236-07:00

The New York Times ran a piece on the Des Moines Register stating that the paper’s endorsement is seen as a great prize among candidates running for president. The article also pointed out that for the first time, the top three editorial spots at the Register are occupied by women and wondered if this wouldn’t give Hillary Clinton an unfair advantage because as we all know, women mindlessly vote

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-63710106320042300292007-12-14T01:44:00.000-07:002007-12-14T01:45:06.878-07:00

We used to get one of those Christmas chain letters from one of Will’s uncle’s family every year. I didn’t get one last year, but then they forgot to invite Katy and I to the extended family Christmas dinner until the afternoon before they held it too. I didn’t miss the letter. It was one of those impossibly irritating laundry lists of self-wonder and inner rapture that could make a Nobel

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-30098792145622446432007-12-13T15:04:00.000-07:002007-12-13T15:05:28.177-07:00

Actually my new dentist is a very nice woman who is much more proactive than the two young guys who took over the practice of my previous dentist when he was diagnosed with lung cancer and subsequently died just a short time after Will did. She was very happy to explain the things she proposed for my near life-long struggle with my gums. The hygienist who cleaned my teeth - I can live without

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-6525398831887375062007-12-12T17:25:00.000-07:002007-12-12T17:26:27.682-07:00

Have you ever woken in the middle of the night for what seemed like no apparent reason only to discover that the vague feeling of unease that tickled your consciousness away from your dreams was more than a headlight driven shadow or the cat prowling? I had one of those night. It began with the a start. One minute I was sleeping, dreaming about needing to be somewhere and not being blessed with

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-73178922335412672122007-12-11T15:38:00.001-07:002007-12-11T15:38:49.377-07:00

I was born at 7:36 A.M. forty-four years ago today. That - is a long time ago my friends, and yet if you asked me if I feel old or to define “old”, I don’t know if I could. Sure I recently berated a poster on my DM-Register blog about the delusional tendencies we “boomers” have about age and how that relates to us (not at all if you were wondering), but 44 is a considerable number of years. I

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-85895761099011977552007-12-11T12:16:00.001-07:002007-12-11T12:17:28.276-07:00

In recognition of your birthday, my dear. I hope that everything goes your way on your special day today.Love You Always,Rob

Robhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14728706092051920167noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-3743086803322626352007-12-09T20:26:00.000-07:002007-12-09T20:29:59.681-07:00

I’m probably not going to be telling you anything about Leona that you don’t already know. But I thought I might share a few of my memories of Leona with you.For those of you who may not know me or perhaps don’t recognize me, my name is Rob. I am Leona’s son-in-law. I was married to Leona’s youngest daughter Shelley for just over 25 years until we lost her a year ago August.When I first met

Robhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14728706092051920167noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-28984457622503091662007-12-02T10:02:00.000-07:002007-12-02T10:03:14.290-07:00

If 32 is old than I am on the verge of becoming Abraham's wife when I turn 44 next week. I say this because I just finished reading a blog piece by reallyexcited at the Des Moines Register, where I also blog (as anniegirl1138) these days though it is more topical stuff. He was lamenting his loss of youth (and hedge-like eyebrows, I think). I understand what he means about gauging one's own

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-31536383674523325042007-12-01T08:16:00.000-07:002007-12-01T08:17:48.471-07:00

I met my husband’s mother-in-law for the first time in August. She had just had a Carotid Endarterectomy, the procedure to remove fatty plaque from neck arteries. She been having trouble speaking and her doctors came to the conclusion she’d had a stroke. My own dad had the same procedure in the fall of 2005 after a serious of TIA’s left him unable to use his left leg or speak clearly. The day we

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-59952538806365244102007-11-30T22:22:00.000-07:002007-11-30T22:23:00.980-07:00

This weekend will mark the first time in about six months that I have been on my own. A family crisis has called Rob away and I will be holding down the fort. I put on a brave face and told Rob not to worry I could handle everything. Which is in fact true. There is little I couldn’t manage should it come up and the odds of anything out of the ordinary arising are, as we all know intellectually,

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-32321679733796531832007-11-29T14:05:00.000-07:002007-11-29T14:36:15.517-07:00

Last night as I was driving home from town after writing group, I finally realized why I have been having troubles with my stomach again. Troubles reminiscent of last fall and winter when nearly everything I put in the mouth resulted in pain that eventually got so bad I was living off soda crackers and Cream of Wheat. The doctors diagnosed a malfunctioning gallbladder and removed it last November

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-60673607238377493932007-11-28T20:19:00.000-07:002007-12-09T20:26:13.598-07:00

My wife Ann wrote a blog piece a while back about music and its relationship to and description of her life at various points over the, well, course of her life. She called it "Soundtracking My Life". I guess I can relate. Certain music pieces are forever associated with certain events and times in my life too. Sometimes the times were such that listening to those tunes can be a bit painful

Robhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14728706092051920167noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-59610649711630528482007-11-28T09:10:00.000-07:002007-11-28T09:11:41.632-07:00

Yesterday's Globe and Mail featured an article in its Life section on what it dubs "security moms" in the United States holding taser parties. At these festive suburban gatherings, women meet to try out and possibly purchase tasers (available in four designer colours). The company responsible for this scene out of a SNL skit is Taser International which began marketing its C2 model this last

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-89303153220785674002007-11-27T09:28:00.000-07:002007-11-26T21:29:09.629-07:00

Oprah is coming to Iowa on December 8th to campaign for Barrack Obama. Some people, I am sure, will be impressed. I like Oprah as much as the next person, providing that person is a double X genetically or spiritually and is okay with the fact that Oprah long ago ceased to be an Everywoman. Really though, why should anyone care that she supports Obama for president? Celebrity endorsements

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-25961693272398290402007-11-26T20:42:00.000-07:002007-11-26T20:43:45.465-07:00

So, I finished the Stephen King novel, On Writing, last night. A triumph for a number of reasons, the least of which is that this is the first book I have read in such a short span of time in nearly two years. My ability to read like a 14 year old bookworm was a sad casualty of widowhood that I would love to vanquish. I polished this novel off in just under four days. I actually read 60 to 70

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-53931652673125622932007-11-25T21:29:00.000-07:002007-11-25T21:30:49.381-07:00

I got my first pair of skates the Christmas I was seven. It was exactly two weeks to the day I got my very first two wheeler, a Schwinn Stingray - green with a banana seat. When I think about it now, I was hitting developmental milestones right and left as this was shortly after I had started reading on my own and beginning to tell time with a fair amount of accuracy. Christmas night my dad took

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-56731140851281516162007-11-24T06:22:00.000-07:002007-11-24T06:23:52.825-07:00

“It starts with this: put your desk in the corner, and every time you sit down there to write, remind yourself why it isn’t in the middle of the room. Life isn’t a support-system for art. It’s the other way around.”Stephen King from On Writing p.101Something I needed to hear. Funny how that works.

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-32662860214701686012007-11-23T15:23:00.000-07:002007-11-23T19:19:19.811-07:00

I began reading my novel today. I only tackled a few chapters before I had to put it down and I came to the decision that I need to wait until after the holidays before I continue. There are a few things I can work on between now and then including a continuity chart for this piece of work and the series of short sci-fi pieces that I began in October that will be inter-locking works in much the

Annnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2394264936694271584.post-91427761992981495792007-11-22T21:04:00.000-07:002007-11-22T21:05:24.536-07:00

I am currently zipping through Stephen King’s book about writing called On Writing. There are two things that make this unusual. The first being that I am zipping through it. Reading anything longer than a news paper article is rare for me these days. If a story runs more than two pages in Oprah:The Magazine, I shudder and steel myself for mental exertion. The second reason my reading of King’s

Annnoreply@blogger.com0